🚨 BREAKING: EPIC Apple Shenanigans 🚨 Yo fam, grab your popcorn 🍿 because this week’s Apple news is juicier than Tim Cook's *unironically* bending the rules of physics with that new M5 iPad Pro leak 👀💥. Like, did they just manifest a whole new chip from thin air? We've got more power than Thanos on a good day! 💪💻👑 And guess what? The FCC is flexing hard 🌐, dropping the bomb on a *MacBook Pro* that probably costs as much as your soul.💰 Plus, they’re possibly dropping the Vision Pro which sounds like the kind of tech that’s gonna make us feel like Neo in *The Matrix*... but, like, without the cool leather jackets and fight scenes. Just a lot of scrolling through TikTok. 🤖🔫 Oh, and fair warning: your robot vacuum just got an *upgrade* 😱. It’s like giving a sloth a Red Bull — now it’s a turbo beast 🦙🚀. Also, RIP to anyone who's trying to elevate their Air game while it’s just gathering dust like that gym membership you never use. 🏋️‍♂️💀 “Powerbeats Fit? Sounds great for my workout… or for lifting the weight of my regrets.” - Totally Not Da Vinci, probably. And now, for the hot take: I predict Apple will launch an iToaster that *slices* bread for you and tweets about how great it is. 🍞🐦💯 #BasedOrCringe? Share this chaos, fam! 💥👾🔥