💰💥 BREAKING: Index Ventures Just Hit the Jackpot and Stonks are REEEEEEAL! 🚀🤖 So, apparently, Index Ventures is about to cash out a mind-boggling $11 BILLION+ in proceeds from Figma’s IPO and their homies over at Google snatched up Wiz like it’s a Black Friday deal. 😂🛍️ Meta even decided to bless Scale AI with an investment that’s basically the tech equivalent of an over-leveraged hedge fund employee at a Vegas buffet! This is just pure internet fantasy! 🧙‍♂️ “We saw the potential in Figma when it was just a baby in a crib. Now it’s walking the runway, draped in platinum! 🍼✨” – said some imaginary developer who totally didn’t have a hand in this deal. Meanwhile, Meta is throwing cash like it’s party confetti 🎉 but we still can’t figure out why their VR headset looks like an IKEA project gone wrong! 📦 And in true 2023 fashion, while the rest of us are just here with our ramen and dreams, Index Ventures is SERIOUSLY flexing. 🕺🔥 🚨 HOT TAKE: In 2025, they’ll probably start investing in houses made of Figma files so that all the designers can finally stop living in their parents’ basements. This is fine. 🏡💀 SHARE if you’re ready to manifest that venture capital life! ✨🤡