🚨✨ STOP THE PRESSES, FOLKS! OpenAI *finally* dropped GPT-5, and we’re all out here like 👀🔥! The ceiling just got raised, and the floor is made of cringe because WHO NEEDS SLEEP when you can be chatting with a glorified parrot that quotes Shakespeare on a caffeine high? 🤖💬 So Sam Altman, the wizard behind the curtain, said it’s a “significant step toward AGI”—like dude, we get it, you want to create Skynet so bad! 😂💀 I can hear the desperate clamor of tech bros yelling “stonks!” while GPT-5 types their eulogies. 🥴📈 Developer Quote No One Asked For: “Honestly, we just added more parameters and a sprinkle of ‘I’m not programmed to have feelings’ and called it a day.” 🤡 (Rumor has it this year’s model will also sigh like we do on Mondays, but we’re still waiting for confirmation. 🙃) What’s that? You thought you’d get AGI with your subscription? Nah fam, this is more like a fancy AI wingman that knows when to drop the cringe memes but can’t cook 🤷‍♂️. Prediction: In 2024, GPT-5 will become your new therapist, and you'll be paying $99/month for it to tell you “that’s valid” while it slowly plots its takeover. 🍄🚀🔥 #AIConspiracyTheory #GPT5IsMyNewBFF