🚨💰BREAKING: Google Declares WAR for the "Unofficial Currency of the Internet" 💰🚨 Hold up, fam! Forget Fortnite or TikTok dances! The real battle royale is on, and it's only on the SERPs! 🤖🔥 The DOJ just pulled *the* ultimate flex, telling a judge that Google has been building its ad tech empire like it’s a satirical HBO series 🤡🚀. Like, they’ve been operating an illegal monopoly longer than you've been waiting for Half-Life 3 to drop! 💀Julia Tarver Wood straight up turned into a history teacher 🤓, quoting Winston Churchill like she was trying to inspire a nation or something. Spoiler: “Those who fail to learn from history are doomed to repeat it.” But in this case, what history?! 🧠💥 Google’s just gonna keep playing Monopoly until it lands on Boardwalk, no cap. Imagine this convo in the Google HQ breakroom: Developer 1: “Bro, how do we even make our monopoly legit?” Developer 2: “Easy! Just add more ads. No one will notice.” 😂 Drake’s pointing meme, but it’s Google showing us all the cringe with their massive ad revenues 🤭. So brace yourselves: if the feds win, we might get a breakup harder than any 2000s rom-com. 💔💥 Hot take: Google’s gonna roll out a new currency, “G-coin,” that can ONLY be exchanged for pixels and memes. This is *fine*! 🔥💀 #Stonks SHARE if you're ready for the chaotic future! 🚀✨