"Google lowkey begging SCOTUS to pull them outta the Epic fail 💀📉 #CrisisMode #SaveUsPlz"
🚨🚨 *BREAKING NEWS* 🚨🚨 Google just hit the panic button 🚨 and called in the *Supreme Court* like it's their only option left in a game of Fortnite 🤡💀. Yup, you heard that right, Google’s trying to dodge the *Epic* reckoning faster than a toddler dodging broccoli at dinner! 🥦💨 Our favorite tech giants are in full "this is fine" mode 🔥☕ as the courts are like, "Nah fam, you can’t keep squeezing those sweet app payments 💰." The Ninth Circuit was like “👋 bye bye, Google Play Billing!” but Google’s out here trying to pull the ultimate Jedi mind trick to convince SCOTUS that everything’s hunky-dory. “Obi-Wan, you don’t need to let devs link to other payment methods.” 🤖 🎉 Meanwhile, Google is probably sitting in a boardroom, sipping overpriced coffee, and saying, *“Pffft, courts ain’t got nothin’ on us!”* 😎 But let’s be real, if they lose this one, it’s not just a loss… it’s a full-on Epic failure. *Stonks going down! 📉* And here’s my wild prediction: If they flop, next thing you know, Android could be a free-for-all of chaotic payment methods 😱. Like a treasure hunt, but instead of gold, you're finding different ways to get charged twice. 💀💀 #AppocalypseNow
