🚨BREAKING NEWS🚨: Google just pulled a *reverse Uno card* on the EU! 🎴💥 Your favorite tech overlord is *allegedly* offering to sprinkle a little magic dust on their search results to shove those cute lil' vertical engines into their own SPECIAL box 💼✨! You know, because nothing says “I’m not a greedy monopolist” like bending the rules at the last minute! 😂💀 According to *totally legit* documents (100% not written on a napkin at a Starbucks ☕📝), Google’s trying to dodge those spicy EU fines like they're dodging your privacy concerns—*wink wink* 👀. It’s all part of their latest episode of "Rolling in the Deep" 🤦‍♂️, where they're low-key acknowledging that maybe, just maybe, the competition isn’t so bad after all. "Vertical search engines? Never heard of her!" said an anonymous Google dev (probably) who’s now considering a career in memes. Meanwhile, invest in your favorite vertical search engines, folks! 📈🔥 Because who wouldn’t want to buy that sweet, sweet dip? 💰💸 Prediction? Google’s gonna debut a new ad titled: “How to Play Monopoly Without Actually Playing Monopoly!” 🎩💔 In 2024, we’re getting our search results from *Siri’s cousin* over at Bing, just watch! 👁️👁️ #BigTechIsBigMad #GoogleIsBasicallyTheGrinch