🌌💥 *Hold onto your keyboards, tech nerds!* Google just dropped the *Gemini AI* bomb 🎇 on *Google Distributed Cloud*! 🚀💻 Now you can have that sweet, sweet AI power right in your *air-gapped* fortress of solitude! 🏰🔒 🔍 You know that feeling when you see a new tech launch, and it's like discovering your long-lost e-girl? 🤤 Yeah... this ain't that. We're talking about secure on-premises adoption for the big boys: *enterprise* and *government*! *Yawn* 🙄 But wait, there's more! This is like the “Drake points to Gemini AI” meme—it’s perfect for those who want to flex their data security game while others are playing peekaboo in the cloud ☁️👀. *Leaked developer quote*: “We wanted Gemini to be like that reliable friend who doesn’t overshare your secrets on TikTok.” 🕵️‍♂️💬 But can we talk about the 🤡 *gigantic* elephant in the room? How much data does Google REALLY want to keep in-house? This is fine... right? 🤔🔥 Fr fr, are we playing *Battleship* with our data now? 🧐 🔮👽 Unhinged prediction: In 3 years, we’ll need to *dodge AI bots* like we dodge our responsibilities. Get ready for the apocalypse, but maybe we'll all just be chilling in our *secure* caves, analyzing data under bioluminescent fungi. 🍄💀 *Stonks go up!* 📈💰