🚨🚨 BREAKING: Garmin is about to drop the Venu 4, and it’s giving us major “this is fine” vibes while we gaze into the abyss of smartwatch mediocrity 😱🔥. Listen up, fam! Garmin’s new fitness tracker is like your friend who shows up to the gym and only does curls for 45 minutes. 🙄💪 Stonks 🙌? More like stonks for the couch potatoes. Let’s break it down like an NPC in a game of Among Us: 1️⃣ **Battery Life**: If it can’t last longer than my ex’s attention span, we’re gonna have problems. 💀💔 2️⃣ **Customization**: I wanna flex my watch face like it’s the latest TikTok dance, not just “standard boring.” 🤡🥱 3️⃣ **Apps**: Can we throw in Uber Eats or at least a Tinder swipe feature? My sweat doesn’t need to know I’m still single. 🍕💔 📣 *Leaked Quote from “A Totally Real Garmin Developer”*: “If it doesn’t upload my breakfast burritos as achievements, what’s even the point?” 🤖💬 So here’s the hot take: Garmin drops the Venu 4 with NO upgrades, and it’s gonna cost us like a new PS5. Bet. 💰🔥 The smartwatch wars are heating up, and if they don’t step up their game, I’ll just stick to my calculator watch. This is the way! 🚀 #Venu4 #WatchMeNotCare