🚨🤡 BREAKING: The FTC's "Click to Cancel" rule just got blocked harder than your grandma's Facebook login! 💀 Why? Because making it easier to cancel subscriptions was too radical, apparently. Who knew consumer rights were a subscription service too? 😫💰 Picture this: you sign up for that “must-have” streaming platform to binge-watch the latest season of *Generic Crime Show #47*... 📺🔥 Only to find out that canceling is like trying to defuse a bomb in a Michael Bay movie 🚀💥. Enter the Eighth Circuit Court of Appeals, basically saying: “Nah fam, we like the chaos.” Stonks down for consumer rights, amirite? 📉🤦‍♂️ Developer leaks from some juice bar tech company: “Yo, we literally want your money forever. Click to Cancel? More like Click to Cope. 😂💸” Drake in the background nodding to scammers and people who's subscriptions are running wild. So what’s next? I predict the rise of subscription cancellation support groups. "Hello, my name is Karen, and I just canceled my 37th subscription. 💬 #ThisIsFine as I drown in monthly payments! Can we get a you-can-cancel-with-one-click button instead of a 45-minute phone call? 📞💔 Honestly, if you still think tech companies care about your sanity, get ready to eat your words. Watch me become a prophet in 2024 when subscriptions can only be canceled on a full moon. 🌕🔥 #UnhingedPredictions