🎉🚀 HOLD UP! 🏃‍♂️💨 Fitbit just threw a #GlowUp party for its app, and the new AI coach is vibin' harder than your gym buddy who only shows up for leg day! 😤🔥 💪💰 Google’s trying to turn Fitbit into your personal wellness guru. Yup, you heard that right! Enter Gemini, the health coach we didn’t ask for but apparently needed. It’s like if your scale became self-aware and started giving you advice while you’re crying over pizza 🍕💔. Now you can enjoy weekly insights that are smarter than your average college dropout! 📈💯 Stonks! 📊💸 But fam, can we talk about how cringe it is that we’re relying on AI to tell us to drink more water? 🤨💀 “Oh, you’ve only had 3 sips today? 🤔 *cue motivational speech*” Leaked quote from a developer: “We just wanted it to make you feel bad about your life choices. #Motivation” 😂😭 So whether you're swole or just here for the *aesthetic*, this is the wellness journey nobody asked for. 🔥 HOLD UP THOUGH: I predict that one day soon, your Fitbit will start recommending workouts tailored to your Netflix binge habits. Imagine "sitting on the couch for 23 hours straight? Here’s your workout: 10 burpees, 2 hours of contemplating life choices!" 🤯 So get ready to flex those brain muscles and also, your social anxiety! 💀🤡 #FlexButMakeItSad #FitbitOrNah