🎉🔥 BREAKING: FEMA just dropped the hottest *UPDATE* since the last time we updated our smoke detector batteries! 🚨💻🏚️ So, buckle up, disaster victims! You wanna claim that sweet, sweet government cash after a hurricane? You’d better have an email address! 😱📧 That’s right—FEMA’s latest move is like asking you to bring your own WiFi to a disaster party. “No internet, no aid”… I mean, what’s next? A TikTok dance challenge for disaster relief? 🤡💃 According to sources* (a.k.a. me, sitting in my mom's basement): “If they can’t connect to the internet, maybe they should just ‘Google it’ 🤔,” said one allegedly leaked FEMA worker. Bro, my dude, when the roof is gone, *Google* ain’t helping much! Also, how do you ‘log in’ when your whole house is a disaster zone? 🚀💀 And get this, tech-savvy stonks 🤑 are gonna love it when the depressed WiFi signal becomes a new meme template: “This is fine” but with FEMA forms. So remember: Stay connected or stay broke! 😜 🔥💥 UNHINGED HOT TAKE: Soon, we’ll have to RSVP with our social media handles just to get emergency services. No cap, we’re headed straight for a post-apocalyptic Instagram age! 📲💀