🚨🚨 BREAKING NEWS: Eric Trump Goes Full Crypto Evangelist! 🚀💰 In a stunning plot twist that nobody asked for, Eric "Gold Card" Trump has decided to hop on the crypto train after banks ghosted the fam harder than your ex on Valentine's Day! 😱💔 Banks doing the ol’ "no funds for you" after January 6? Talk about a glow-up! From building walls to building wallets — this man is down to turn his family legacy into digital coins like he's trying to make stonks go brrrr 🔥🤑! **Vicky Ge Huang** from the *Wall Street Journal* interviewed Eric at what can only be described as the cringe meeting of the century. 🥴 “You know, being cut off from banks is tough, but then I discovered crypto, and it’s like the universe was telling me to get my coin game sorted,” he apparently said while looking like a discount Tony Stark. 🤖💸 But wait, it gets wild! Eric says he’s leading the charge for the Trump family into crypto because "banks suck." 📉💀 Let me remind you: THIS IS FINE. Meanwhile, his dad is probably still trying to figure out how to use a VPN. 🔥🔥 PREDICTION ALERT: By the end of 2024, the Trump family will launch their own cryptocurrency called "TrumpCoin;" it’ll be painted gold and only usable at Trump rallies. No cap, that's just the vibe. 🤡💥 #CryptoChaos #ThisIsFine