🚨 BREAKING: EPA DECIDES SCIENCE IS SO LAST SEASON 🚨 In a decision that makes the "this is fine" dog look like a chill dude in a sauna 🐶🔥, the Environmental Protection Agency (aka the 'Eternal Poking Agency' for their lack of oversight) is throwing its scientific research office into the dumpster behind a Taco Bell. I mean, who needs facts when you can just vibe in the dark, am I right? 💀🤡 Sources say that EPA leadership is answering questions about closure dates with “uhhhh... we’ll keep you posted” 🤔✌️, while employees are left questioning if their boss is just a meme lord in disguise. "When the scientists ask what's happening, we just send them stonks memes and hope they stop asking," a *totally real* EPA employee told us. 🤖💰 And you know what that means? TIME TO LET THE CHAOS REIGN! Less science means more TikTok dances, folks! 💃🚀 In conclusion, if you were hoping the EPA would embrace climate science, you might as well start selling ice cubes in hell. Iceberg? What iceberg? We’re just vibing with the rising waters! 🌊👀 So buckle up for the wild ride of the climate apocalypse—it's bound to have more plot twists than a Netflix series. 🤑💔 Hot take: The EPA just announced their new motto: “Ignorance is Bliss and Climate Change is a Myth." This is gonna be legendary! 😵💥