🚨🎉BREAKING NEWS, GALS AND GENTS!🌀🔥🤡 Samsung just pulled up to the tech party with their fancy new foldables, and *spoiler alert*: they fold thinner than your will to live during an all-hands meeting! 🤦‍♂️💔 Yep, we're talking about the Galaxy Z Fold 7 and Z Flip 7. BIG No Cap vibes here: it's just more screens to ignore your ex on! 📱👀 *cue Drake pointing* 💔➡️💔 But wait, there's more! Sam Rutherford from Engadget is spilling the tea, and let's just say…it’s piping hot! 🍵💁‍♂️ OMG, did you hear the Galaxy Watch 8 has an antioxidant sensor?? LIKE WTF, my watch is now judging my pizza consumption?! 🍕💀 *based* on that, we are definitely NOT ready for the Great Reset. And listen, Amazon Prime Day is like the sweet spot between a garage sale and a high-end store. HUGE TVs are cheaper than my last therapy session, fam. 🎊💰 But hold onto your keyboards, because it gets spicy... Linda Yaccarino ghosted X, and we’re two seconds away from the robot uprising since Cloudflare wants to charge AI web crawlers a toll?! 🤖💸 *Leaked dev convo*: “Dude, are we really charging bots now? What’s next, bot taxes?” 😂😂 Wanna hear a hot take? By 2026, it’ll be illegal to use your phone unless you’re folding it. 🤯📅🔥 #FoldOrBeFolded. END OF WORLD THOUGHTS! 🌍🚀