🔥🚀 BREAKING NEWS: The Future of Periods is HERE and it’s SMARTER than your average frat bro! 🩸🤖💰 Emm just pulled a **Giant Stonks** move with a **💵 $9M seed round** to create the one and ONLY *smart* menstrual cup that could outsmart your ex! 💅💅 Like, WHO NEEDS AN APP FOR MENSTRUAL CYCLES?! 😱 Apparently, Emm is throwing a college-level education at our tampons, but instead of extra credit, we get Bluetooth 🤯📲. Gone are the days of *"This is fine"* - now you’ll have *AI* telling you *when* you can unleash the Kraken 🐙! “We’re reinventing the wheel,” said some *dev* who is 100% not leaking bets in the backroom 🤫🤣. “I mean, if it can track your cycle, maybe it can stop your boyfriend from asking every time he sees a puppy 🐶” (Totally a real quote, not like a hacky meme or anything.) So, mark your calendars for 2026 when this revolution will be live! 🗓️💥 I have a theory: these cups will be able to predict your feelings based on your flow. “Sad? Just tap your cup. It’ll send you a playlist of sad songs and a recipe for chocolate lava cake.” 🎶🍰 **Hot take:** *In 5 years, these smart cups will be controlling the stock market and overthrowing world leaders. We’re all just living in the menstrual matrix now. 🌌👑* #PeriodGoals #SmartCupsAreHere #SeetheAndCope