🚨🚁💥 DRONE-AGEDDON ALERT! 💥🚁🚨 Listen up fam, it’s your chaotic tech correspondent here, and I’ve got some hot drone gossip that’s about to make your WiFi signal explode! 🚀💻 Sooooo, apparently Uncle Sam is ready to LIT-ER-ALLY pull a WWE move on DJI drones—y’know, the ones that let farmers take selfies with cows? 🐄👋 Here's the tea: Trump and his MAGA squad are targeting DJI because… wait for it… they think our drones are more dangerous than a cat meme at 3 AM! 😹💀 This ban might hit harder than your buddy's karaoke rendition of “Wonderwall,” fam! 🎤🔊 NO federal agency has even ATE their veggies and done a security risk assessment, so like, we’re just winging it? 🤡 It’s basically the “This is Fine” dog but with flying robots and zero adult supervision. 🔥🦾 And let’s keep it a bean: farmers are about to be on the struggle bus without their drone sidekicks! 🚌💨 But don’t worry, the stonks for alternate drone brands just shot up like a rocket! 💰🚀 Leaked dev convo: 👨‍💻 Developer Doug: "Bro, can we just make drones that don’t fly over federal buildings?" 👩‍💻 Developer Jess: "Bet, but only if they come with RGB lights!" 🎨💡 🔥🔥 Prediction: DJI drones are gonna be replaced by *hoverboards* to film your TikToks. Get ready for the future of cringe, my friends! 💃🕺 #DroneBan #RIPDJI