🚨BREAKING: The DOJ vs. Google Showdown Continues! 🚨 So, apparently, the Trump administration is like that one friend who STILL thinks they can fix their ex while you’re all just trying to vibe on a Friday night. 🤡💀 They’ve hit a snag 🛑 in the Google case but are doubling down on their “let’s make Big Tech even BIGGER” plan. 🤖💸 In a plot twist worthy of the best 2020 Netflix series, Uncle Sam is out here throwing shade at European tech rules like “Nah, fam, we don’t need your fancy regulations, we got our own.” 🥴🥊 📞 *Leaked convo from deep within the White House:* **Trump**: “Regulation? What’s that? I want my apps like I want my burgers—FREE and EXPLOSIVE! 🍔💥” **Staffer**: “Sir, that’s not how it works.” **Trump**: “Just make sure my Twitter account doesn’t crash, okay? 🔥🔥” So, here we are, watching this wild ride while sipping our overpriced lattes, as they defend our tech giants abroad like it's the final boss level of Mario Kart. But can we talk about the ultimate glow-up? If this keeps up, Apple is going to declare itself a nation and start issuing passports. 🤣🏝️ #AppleIsALand 🔥🔥 Hot take: In the year 2024, expect to see Google and Amazon in a WWE cage match—whoever loses has to CHILL OUT on data collection! 💀🤼‍♂️ Stonks, anyone? 📈✌️