🚨BREAKING NEWS🚨: Keychain, the startup more lost than your WiFi signal during a Zoom call, just snagged a whopping $30M💰💸! But plot twist: they don’t even HAVE a single customer in India! 🤡💀 That’s right, folks! They’re basically Jordan in Space Jam - all hype, no game! 🏀👽 Now, this Gurugram-based squad is ready to pull a classic *American Hustle*—trying to get more customers across North America than your average TikTok influencer has followers. 🤯 Drake’s pointing meme intensifies. 🔥📈 In a leaked chat we totally didn't make up, a developer named Rohan said, “We’ll figure it out, bro, like the dude in that ‘This is Fine’ meme. Just add more memes to the pitch!” 🤖💥 Meanwhile, the investors are over here doing the stonks meme like they’re high on caffeine and hopium! 📈🥴 Keychain’s business model? “We're like an Uber for keychains, but we don’t have keys or cars!” 🤷‍♂️💀 Can we boo this company off the stage already? 🔥Hot take: In 2025, Keychain will be replaced by an *AI run by squirrels* and we’ll all be too busy seething over it! Brace yourselves, fam! Buckle up, it’s gonna be a wild ride! 🚀💨✨ #ChaoticStartupEnergy #NotMyKeychain