🚨🍾 Costco’s Prosecco SHATTERED reality?! 🍾🚨 Listen up, wine lovers! If you picked up some of that fancy Kirkland Prosecco from Costco 🏬 between April 25 and August 25, you might be sitting on a ticking time bomb! 💣💥 No cap, these bottles are allegedly bursting into a million pieces like your dreams after downloading a 1-star app! 💔💔 Costco's basically saying, "Hey, we KNOW you wanna toast to good times, but HOW ABOUT NO?! 🚫🥂" 🤡💀 Imagine sipping your bubbly only for it to explode like Kanye on Twitter! 🌌💥 And don't even get me started on all the poor souls just trying to vibe at their picnics—it turns into a reenactment of *This is Fine* but with shrapnel! 🤷‍♂️🔥 “Yo, one minute you’re flexin’ on the 'gram with some chill prosecco, next minute you’re dodging glass shards like Neo in The Matrix!” - said some "leaked" Costco developer who probably mixes grape juice instead of handling PR. 🥇📈 BUT WAIT, it gets better! My hot take? Within a year, Costco’s gonna debut an entirely new line of “unbreakable” prosecco, and we’re all gonna pretend we were NEVER scared, while casually dragging the residual trauma into the next Costco trip. STONKS! 🚀💰 So, share this with your friends because your next post-brunch Insta could literally be... *explosive*! 💥🍾 #ProseccoGoneWild #SafetyFirst #UnhingedVibes