🚨✨BREAKING NEWS: Congress is finally stepping into the 21st century! 🚀🤖✨ Say goodbye to your health & location data being sold like hotcakes at a garage sale! 🍔💰💀 That's right, American fam! Senator Elizabeth Warren and Representative Mary Gay Scanlon are dropping a hot new remix of the Health and Location Data Protection Act like it's the next TikTok dance challenge. 💃🔥 They're coming for those data brokers who think they can treat your health info like their personal ClowneryCash. 🤡💸 According to "leaked" insider quotes from a *totally real* developer: “We thought we were just trading digital stickers, but now we’re #cancelled. Thanks, Congress!” 😱🚫 This shiny new bill aims to turn those shady data brokers from "Oh, this is fine" to "I’m seething!" 🐍💔. If you ever thought your AI chat with Claude was just between you and your digital therapist – think again! Now your deepest secrets may not be up for grabs by just anyone with a VPN and a questionable moral compass! Hot take: Next up, Congress will regulate your mom's Facebook posts too—no more sharing “just got my flu shot!” memes without a waiver! 💀📜🔥 #StonksGoingUp Share this before they try to ban that next! 😂🔗