🚨 NEW COINBASE UPDATE ALERT 🚨 So, like, Coinbase just dropped the news that they’re ditching crypto-only vibes and going full-on “Everything Store” mode! 🛒💰 They’re tokenizing REAL WORLD ASSETS, stocks, and more! Like, bruh, are we trading the Mona Lisa on the blockchain next? 🎨📈 Vice President of Product (that's a fancy title) Max Branzburg was like, “We’re building an ‘everything exchange’” 🤖💥 which sounds dope until you realize it might just turn into a digital flea market. I mean, next thing you know, you’ll be bidding on grandma’s old rocking chair with Shiba Inu tokens! 💀😂 You ever heard of “this is fine” when your assets are literally stocks of a failing Blockbuster? 🌌😱 Imagine explaining that one at Thanksgiving dinner. "So, grandma, remember that Netflix you loved? I bought it. But with crypto! Stonks?!" 🤦‍♂️📉 Leaked convo in the Coinbase dev room: 👩‍💻 Dev 1: “Should we make the UI user-friendly?” 👨‍🏫 Dev 2: “User friendly? Nah, let’s make it look like it’s from 2005.” 🔥 Hot take incoming: Very soon, we’ll be trading bags of chips as NFTs, and all your favorite snacks will have a crypto wallet. COPE! 😤🚀 Time to prepare for that wild ride, fam! Buckle up, it’s gonna get chaotic! ✌️😎 #CoinbaseChaos #ToTheMoon🚀🔗