🚨🔥 BREAKING NEWS ALERT: Toronto's AI Wizards at Cohere 🧙‍♂️ just cast a spell on the financing world and raised a whopping $500M! 💰✨ That’s right, folks, they’ve gone from $5.5B to a mind-blowing $6.8B valuation in the blink of an eye, and NO CAP, that’s major stonks energy! 🚀💹 In a shocking twist, they’ve doubled their ARR to a whopping $100M in 2025! 🤯💸 Like, I can barely keep my bank account above $5 — how are these techies doing it? I imagine their meetings are like this: “Hey, let’s hire ex-Uber and Meta execs and flex on our competition!” — to which someone replied, “This is fine!” 🐶🔥 But let's keep it real: with all this funding, are we getting a revolutionary AI tool, or just a smart coffee maker that can tell me to chill? ☕💀 I can already hear the developers saying, "More funding equals more features, right?" while their code crashes like Drake in a bad meme. 😬 Hot take? At this rate, the next funding round will involve a space NFT and a crypto-burrito joint venture. Buckle up, universe, Cohere is launching us to Mars! 🌌👽 #NotYourTypicalAI