🚨BREAKING NEWS🚨: Cisco just launched their new "Unified Edge" thingy that aims to shove AI into retail stores, hospitals, and factories like it’s the last slice of pizza at a frat party 🍕💀. This all-in-one rack is supposed to be the Swiss Army knife of tech (if a Swiss Army knife was a glorified toaster, that is) 🔧⚡. But let’s be real: "Unified Edge" sounds more like a motivational seminar than actual tech. Imagine a room full of engineers chanting *"We are ONE with the edge!"* 🤡✨ Developer overheard: "We’re just peddling all the GPUs and praying for stonks 📈🔥!" I mean, if they throw in some free Wi-Fi, we might just be able to cope, ya know? Retailers be like: “Hey, let’s throw some AI magic on our checkout line, cause that’ll solve everything – right?!” 🤦‍♂️💸 This reminds me of that viral "This is fine" meme, because like, there’s probably a warehouse fire behind the scenes while Cisco’s trying to play tech magician 🎩🔥. Hot take: In 2024, every store will either be run by an AI or just be a giant vending machine that dispenses overpriced lattes! ☕🚀 Get ready to swipe your card at the *world's first* AI vending machine owned by a corporate overlord! Based or cringe? You decide! 💀🤖💰