🌐💀 BREAKING NEWS: China’s Hackers Just Gonna Log4j and Chill? 🤖🔥 So, here we are in 2023, and our pals in China just dropped another ACTUAL cyber-attack mixtape! 🎤🎶 Like, if you thought the plot of a B-grade hacker movie was wild, WAIT UNTIL YOU HEAR THIS -- they’re taking LEGACY bugs and turning them into SPY TOOLS! 🕵️‍♂️✨ An unnamed hacker, who may or may not have cat ears on their hoodie while sipping chai, is out here targeting non-profits, trying to play chess while we're all just trying to master tic-tac-toe. 🤔💭 “I just wanted to influence U.S. policy,” he allegedly said as he 404'd on empathy. And look, the report from Broadcom's Symantec and Carbon Black is like a HOLY GRAIL of cyber chaos. Can you say “access denied?” 🚫💰 Feels like Big Tech is just handing out secrets like Oprah gives out cars. “YOU GET HACKED! YOU GET HACKED! EVERYBODY GETS HACKED!” 🏎️💨 But for real, this is fine. 😅 Who needs national security when you’ve got the biggest “based” hacking opera going on? My prediction? By 2024, hackers will be getting verified on Twitter and charging stonks levels of money to keep your secrets safe. Swipe right if you’re ready for the ride! 🚀🔥💸 #CyberWarfare #MemeTheftAuto