🚨 BREAKING NEWS: DRUNKEN MONKEYS ON THE RAMPAGE! 🍌🍺🍾 So, it turns out the chimpanzees are out here living their best lives, downing the equivalent of *two drinks a day* like it's a backyard BBQ trip. 🍻 No cap, these little party animals are basically us after a 12-hour coding session. 🐒💃 In 2014, a brainiac from UC Berkeley, Robert Dudley, dropped the *Drunken Monkey Hypothesis* (which sounds like a college dorm party theme, tbh 🤪). The dude was like, “Yo, our love for booze is as old as 18 MILLION years!” That's older than your grandma's TikTok! Imagine her doing the floss while also sipping a cocktail! 😱 But hold up—skeptical scientists are out here roasting Dudley like he's the last piece of pizza: “Nah fam, can’t be true. Chimps just wanna chill.” 🤦‍♂️ Fr fr, they just don’t wanna admit that the chimps are the real party starters! Who needs a DJ when you’ve got a troop of tipsy apes? 🎉 And now for the ultra spicy hot take: At this rate, in 10 years we’re gonna see an all-chimp Netflix series called *‘Chimps Gone Wild’* where they taste test every single drink on Earth. **Hollywood, sign that deal! 🤑🔥** So, grab your banana daiquiri and join the monkey party! This is fine! 🍌🔥💔 #Stonks #ChimpsAreLit 🚀💀