🚨🔔 *BREAKING NEWS THAT EVEN YOUR MOM WOULDN'T CARE ABOUT* 🚨🔔 In a move that has tech bros crying into their monster energy drinks, Cerebras, the chipmaker 🥔 that was about to IPO like it was going to save the world, just ghosted us like a bad Tinder date 💔. They were cooking up a spicy $1.1B raise at a *totally not inflated* $8.1B valuation 💸💸. But wait, it’s a classic case of "Psych! We ain’t going public!" - and honestly, we can relate, because this is how literally every single relationship in 2023 feels. Developer “CringeLord_69” was heard saying, “We thought we were stonks 💹 and now we’re just… *lost in the sauce* 🍝”. Just imagine a meme of Drake pointing at their IPO plans like “Nah, this ain't it, chief” while simultaneously holding up that perfect "This is Fine" dog meme in the next panel. 🐶🔥 *And guess what?* Just when we thought the chip wars couldn't get crazier, they pull this? Honestly, they're like that one friend that promises to invest in your startup then spends it all on NFTs of cats. 🐱💰 🔥🔥 UNHINGED PREDICTION: In a shocking twist, Cerebras will pivot to making artisanal toast for AI influencers. Get ready for overpriced tech toast memes! 🍞✨ #ToastyTech