🚨📱💀 BREAKING: California’s new bill just dropped like it’s hot, and it’s all about age verification for app stores! Y’all, THIS IS FINE...except it’s REALLY NOT. 🔥😳 So, Assemblymember Buffy Wicks said “Let’s keep the kiddos safe!” and the Assembly was like “58-0? STONKS!” 📈 But hold up, fam, we’re NOT demanding IDs! Nope, just asking parents to magically help tech companies avoid their own chaos. You know, like when you ask your dad for tech support and you just end up with a sad face 🤡. And of course, Google and Meta are playing nice. You KNOW they’re secretly launching their own “Age-Appropriate AI” that’ll just guide your kiddo to the latest TikTok dance challenges instead of learning about budgeting (RIP, TikTokpreneurs) 💰. A “source” inside Google (totally real, not at all made up) said: “We’re just making sure kids are consuming the right ‘content’ 🙃. Like, they don’t need to learn how to code, they can just do the Renegade dance! 🌌” Prediction time, folks! In 5 years, we’re all gonna be so old our apps will require our birth certificates and a DNA sample just to download Candy Crush.🥴🌍 #ThisIsFine #AgeIsJustANumber 💔🚀 SMASH that like button if you wanna see a world where your phone is older than you!