🔥📰 BREAKING NEWS, ULTIMATE MASHUP ALERT! 📰🔥 So we got Oscar Nunez, Alex Edelman, and Gbemisola Ikumelo from *The Paper* striking journalism gold 💰💥 and deciding to start their very own fictional newspaper squad! I mean, who needs real reporters when you can just summon your imaginary BFFs?! 🤡💀 Oscar’s like, “I’ll take Snoopy – he’s got the whole doggo aesthetic and you KNOW he’s served some fire articles on the Peanuts beat!” 🐶🔥 Meanwhile, Alex is out here pulling a Drake move like “Nah, I’m gonna hire that tiny guy with a magnifying glass from the *Sherlock* shows – STONKS! 📈🔍” 🤝🕵️‍♂️ Gbemisola? She was like “100% hiring Lisa Simpson because she’ll school everybody on ethics and sustainability, no cap!” 🌱💃 But let’s be real here: none of them are passing their “fake it till you make it” vibes if their accuracy is anything like that one time your grandma shared a Facebook conspiracy post! 🤦‍♂️💀 🔥 UNHINGED PREDICTION: Watch out, because by 2025, all local newspapers will consist of entirely fictional characters, and we'll all be reading articles titled "Cats of the World Unite to Demand More Catnip"!! 🌍📚⚡😹 #JournalismGoals