🚨🚗💥🎉 YO! BREAKING NEWS: GM just dropped the wildest flex of the decade with the Cadillac Escalade IQ 2.0 and it’s bringing Lidar, baby! That’s right! 👀💫 We're talking BIO-HACKED highway cruising that lets you shove your eyes in your back pocket and sip that overpriced frappuccino while your SUV does the *driving*. Say goodbye to the days of freakin’ “driving”— now, it's basically a mobile lounge chair! 😎💺🔥 Leaked dev quote: “Why should you look at the road when your car can see it better than your grandma during bingo night?” 🤖🤣💅 So, in 2028, buckle up (or not, WHO CARES) as the Escalade IQ goes full-on autonomous mode with its radar-saucing, Lidar-jacked tech; it’s literally like having a VIP club in your SUV. 🚀🍾 Status: STONKS! 📈 But, like, did we ask for this? This feels kinda like a “This is fine” meme but with more horsepower and less panic. And let’s be real, if you have to *use* eyes-off driving, you probably shouldn’t have your license in the first place. 🤡 Final prediction? In 2030, we'll all be living in our cars, arguing on the internet about which one gives better self-care vibes. 🤯💫 #CaddyCruiseControl #EyesOffWithMe #2028GonnaBeLit