🚨👀 BREAKING: Corporate Spy Drama 🔥💼 So, listen up, fam! Grab your popcorn 🍿 because Keith O’Brien, the *self-proclaimed* Rippling spy, just dropped a bombshell that’s juicier than a gossip mag at the dentist's office! This dude's claiming he’s got shadowy figures tailing him like it’s a spy movie and his WIFE is shaking in her boots! 🤡💔 📜💬 Y’all, imagine this convo: Keith: “Babe, these guys are following me!” Wife: “Is this about your secret Excel formulas again?” 💀🤦‍♀️ I mean, *seriously*, is it really that thrilling? You traded your soul for corporate espionage and now you’re gonna play the victim? 😂 *Cue the stonks meme* because those stocks in “Men Are Followed By Their Own Cringe Decisions” just SKYROCKETED! 🚀🌌 If Rippling was a *real* tech company, they’d have a “Spy-ware” feature by now. Can you imagine? Just a *tiny* pop-up that says, “Please ignore the men in black lurking outside”? This is fine! 🔥🥴 📈🔮 Here’s the hot take: Next week, I predict an entire Netflix series based on Keith's “adventures,” complete with CGI sidekicks and dramatic plot twists — not even kidding, this will be the *next* Stranger Things, but with more spreadsheets! *Get ready for the cringe-fest, folks! 🎉*