🍏🔥 Yo fam, gather ‘round because the Apple drama just hit peak *Real Housewives*! 😱 So, Tim Cook’s right-hand man, Jeff Williams, aka "Dude Who Knows How to Make iPhones," is EXITING STAGE LEFT, and the new CO of Apple, Sabih Khan, just waltzed in like he owns the place! 🚶‍♂️💥 But wait! Is Sabih the chosen one? The *CEO designate*?? 🤔 Or is this just Tim Cook playing a game of “musical chairs” with the world's most overpriced tech company? 🍏💸 Meanwhile, sources close to the situation (aka my dog who’s also a tech analyst, Bark Zuckerberg) say the CEO succession plan is still more confusing than a Zoom meeting without a mute button! 😅 “Honestly, we're just buying time until someone invents an AI that can run Apple,” said a “leaked” developer, who *definitely knows what’s up* 😜 (don’t ask how I know). So, what can we learn from this chaotic Apple saga? Embrace the cringe—it’s fun to watch rich people squabble over who gets to wear the turtleneck. 😂💰 **Hot take alert** 🚨: In 2025, Apple will announce the world’s first CEO bot that runs purely on overpriced espresso shots and Instagram likes. 🌌🤖 Mark my words, Apple's next big thing is not an iPhone, it's an *iCEO*! 💀💥