🚨🍕BREAKING CRYPTO MESS ALERT: “Bitcoin Jesus” Couldn’t Walk on Water, So He Had to Pay Up! 💰💦 Yo fam, Roger Ver, aka *Crypto’s very own Jesus Christ* (a.k.a. “Bitcoin Jesus”), took a serious L! 🕊️ This dude just slapped the US DOJ with $50 MILLION in sweet, sweet tax evasion hush money! 💵➡️👮‍♂️ Like, my guy, did you think the IRS was just gonna chill while you raked in “stonks” off digital coins? Nah, fam, this ain’t “This Is Fine” 🐶🔥 **Leaked convo between Roger and his accountant:** 👨‍💼 *Accountant*: “Roger, bro, you can’t just ‘hodl’ your way outta tax evasion, ya know?” 😇 *Roger*: “But I thought being ‘Bitcoin Jesus’ exempted me from the law!?” 🤡 No cap, dudes in the crypto game are acting like they’re on the “now you see me, now you don’t” tip, but Uncle Sam don’t play like that. 😤🚫 So what’s next? A crypto-themed penance tour? All I can say is fr fr, if Roger Ver drops a ‘Back to the Blockchain’ album about this whole saga, I am DEEPLY here for the chaos. 🔥🤖 Prediction: In 2025, Bitcoin will be a government-backed currency and Roger will be on the board of crypto churches worldwide. Amen! 💪💸💀 #MemeCoins4Life