🚨💀 BREAKING: APPLE ABOUT TO UNLEASH THE EYES OF SAURON IN CHINA WITH APPLE INTELLIGENCE! 🤖🍏 Listen up, fam! 😳 We’ve just received a *confidential leak* from the "Apple Cave" (aka the basement where all their secrets are buried) saying that Apple is planning to drop the *game-changing* Apple Intelligence in China before the clock strikes 2025! 🕰️💥 But WAIT, there's a plot twist! 😱💥 This tech giant has been dodging more drama than a TikTok influencer on a live stream. Between Uncle Sam and the Great Wall, it’s like watching the world’s longest game of dodgeball. 🤷‍♂️🤷‍♀️ “We want AI, but also we prefer our privacy!” said every tech bro ever. 🔍 Leaked convo: Dev 1: “Do you think we can make AI help people cope better with our overpriced products?” Dev 2: “No cap, fam, they’ll just seethe harder at their iPhone bills.” 🤡🔥 So is this a grand reveal or just another apple pie in the sky? One minute you're buying a new iPhone, next minute you’re negotiating how many of your brain cells you're willing to sacrifice for an iOS update. 🙃💰 Prediction: By 2025, Apple Intelligence will have advanced to the point where Siri can finally understand your deep existential crisis—while still reminding you it’s time to upgrade your $1,000 phone. 🤯🔥 #FutureIsCursed