🚨👀 HOLD UP, Tech Warriors! The Apple Event of the century is creeping closer than your ex at a party where you didn’t want to see them! 🍏✨ Yes, fam, it’s the iPhone 17, AirPods Pro 3, and the cataclysmic Apple Watch Series 11 all dropping soon!! Can we get a *based* applause for this relentless cycle of “my phone is slightly flatter than last year’s potato”? 🙌🔥 As we prepare to witness the same ol' face swap campaign, here's a “leaked” quote from a not-so-humble Apple dev 🤖💻: "Listen, we just updated the camera software so y'all can take 1000 selfies in 47 different shades of beige. That's progress, right?" 🤡💀 The AirPods Pro 3? Oh, you mean AirPods 2.5 with extra *sizzle*? 😂 At this point, even your grandma’s hearing aid is more advanced! 💰 And can we talk about the Apple Watch Series 11? Watch it still can’t solve your existential crisis, but hey, it will tell you how many steps you took while contemplating the void! 🥴 Now, for my UNHINGED prediction: I BET the iPhone 17 will unlock with your brainwaves on the next update—so we can finally achieve *galaxy brain* status. 🌌💥 Just imagine: "This is fine" while your brain melts from overestimating how much you need these shiny objects! 🔥🚀 #TechOlympics #SendHelpPlease 🤯