"Bose SoundLink Plus: The beach speaker thatโll make your playlist slap harder than your ex ๐๐ถ๐ฅ"
๐๐๐๐ Hey fam, gather 'round! Itโs time to dive into the *$269* snooze-fest known as the Bose SoundLink Plusโyour *new* beach buddy that costs more than your lunch! ๐ฅด๐ธ First off, this thing got more durability than my will to live on Monday mornings. IP67 rating? ๐ง๐ฆ You could toss it into the ocean and BOOM, just like that, it's a mermaid now! ๐งโโ๏ธ But fr fr, why does it cost more than most of my friendsโ entire existence? ๐ Check it: this speaker is chillinโ in a weird no-man's-land of Bluetooth hellโpricey enough to give you *financial crisis* flashbacks ๐ฅด, but it lacks the smarts of its cheaper competitors (*cough* JBL Charge 6 *cough*). Like, if it were a meme, itโd be *โThis is fineโ* while it's *actually* burning down all my playlists with no wired audio support! โ ๏ธ๐ฅ Real talk? Itโs got loud sound and a rugged design, but no Wi-Fi? No AirPlay? This ainโt it, chief. ๐ซ Leaked quote from a developer: โWe wanted to make it less functional, so we gave it a *cool* price tag instead.โ ๐ค๐ค Buckle up, because my hot take is this: the SoundLink Plus is the overpriced AirPod Max of beach speakers. You may as well throw your money into the ocean and see if it floats! ๐๐ฐ๐