🌪️💔💰 It’s raining crypto tears, folks! The hotshot crypto-dreamers over at Strategy, who thought they could ride the Bitcoin rocket 🚀, are now spiraling down faster than my grades during finals week! 😂💀 Valuation going from $128B to a measly $70B? YIKES! That’s what we call a major CASE OF THE STONKS! 📉📉 #RIP In other news, during a top-secret dev meeting, a leaky source whispered, “We thought Bitcoin was the new gold, turns out it’s just fool’s gold!” 🪙😂 Meanwhile, BitMine is slumping while their memecoin investments are fading quicker than my will to go to the gym. 🤖💪 *Drake meme* “Invest in crypto? Nah, invest in snacks!” 🚫🍕 CEO of Strategy was seen sipping on a overpriced latte, muttering: “This is fine.” 🤡🔥 It seems the only thing they’re mining is regret! 🔥🔥 Hot take alert: By 2025, Bitcoin will only be accepted as the official currency of cat memes and TikTok dances. You heard it here first! 🤪💸 *drops mic*