🚨💰BREAKING: Databricks is about to hit that *Stonks* 🚀💸! I mean, bro, this company just got a valuation bump to $100B like it found an extra donut in the office fridge 🍩🤯! 🤡 Sources (probably some dude in a hoodie with too much caffeine): they’re finalizing a funding round, co-led by Thrive Capital 🎩 and the notorious venture capital overlords, a16z. You know the vibe; they’re just in it for the clout and the memes. “We believe in the power of data,” says one *leaked* developer who’s definitely sitting in a bean bag chair with a beanie on. 😎🔥 Let’s break down: Databricks went from “hey, we’re kinda cool” at $62B 🚫 to “WE’RE BAYMAX, WE GOT AI ON CRACK” in less than a year. Fr fr, that’s like upgrading from a flip phone to a spaceship in a TikTok minute. 💥🌌 So what’s next? 🤔 Are we seeing a data-driven IPO that’s shinier than your grandma's silverware? I predict *Databricks* will just take this $100B and invest it in an army of sentient robots 🦾 to analyze cat memes at warp speed. This is fine. 😂🔥 What a time to be alive! #Databricks4Life #AIIsTheFuture