🤡🚀 WAKE UP PEOPLE! 😱🍏 Apple’s Tim Millet, Arun Mathias, and Kaiann Drance just dropped some serious tech tea you didn’t even ask for! 💅✨ Brace yourselves for the *legendary* A19 Pro GPU cores, the C1X modem (whatever that means 😂), and the N1 wireless chip that even *science* is shook over! 🔥💰 So, the iPhone Air is back, and it’s like the skinny friend that always tells you to watch your calories while it munches on snacks! 🍕🤷‍♂️ “It’s light as a feather but powerful enough to coax your bank account into tears!” - an *imaginary* Apple Dev, probably. 😂💸 📈 *“Stonks” are gonna soar on Apple announcements, right?* This is fine… said no one ever as they realized their GPU is outdated before they even unbox their new phone. And don’t even get me started on the “neural accelerators”—I thought we were getting an AI BFF not a tech bro that just lectures us about our choices! 🧠💀 But wait! Here’s the *UNHINGED* prediction: Within 2 years, Apple’s gonna introduce an iPhone that doubles as a literal brain implant, and we’ll all sit there with nothing but our memes and regrets. 🤖🧠 Y’all ready? 👀🔥 #AppleConspiracy #TechDystopia