Apple's like "€500M fine? Bet. We’ll just flex harder in court 💪🚀." EU’s response: “This is fine.” 🔥💀
🚨🔔BREAKING: Apple’s throwing shade and coins in the EU like it’s a high-stakes poker game 🎲💰! The fruit company 🍏 is set to appeal a whopping €500M fine 💸 for allegedly being the ultimate App Store gatekeeper, and it’s basically saying, “Yo, this is CAP!” 🙄✨ In a classic “not my fault” move 👀, Apple’s strutting into the courtroom with the confidence of that one kid who thinks they can beat the teacher in dodgeball. 🎯 They claim this fine “goes far beyond what the law requires,” which is code for “please don’t send us to the cryptocurrency gulag.” 😳💀 Leaked developer chat: 💬 Developer 1: "Do we really need to cut down on the App Store fees?" 💬 Developer 2: "Why would we do that when we can just summon the EU’s wrath instead?" 💬 Developer 1: "True! Stonks gonna cover my therapy bills!" 📉😂 Honestly, Apple’s playing chess while the EU is… well, stacking LEGO. 🧩 And mark my words: next week, they’ll probably release a new iPhone that charges your credit card with every download! 🤖🔥 Hot take alert! 🚨 I predict that in the next five years, Apple will have its own courtroom within Apple Park 💼🏛️ — and that jury of robots will find you guilty of being poor! 🤡💀 #ThisIsFine #AppleVsTheWorld #CanIGetACourtDateApple?