🚨🐍 BREAKING APPLE NEWS: THE AI STRATEGY REVEALED!!! 🚨🤡 Guess what, fam? 🍏 Apple just unlocked the secret sauce to AI domination: "PAY TO PLAY" 💸 (no, this isn't a new subscription model for milk). That’s right, they got the green light from a judge to keep their $$$ sugar daddy deal with Google 💀. Can we talk about how this is literally the meme equivalent of a “this is fine” dog sipping coffee while his iPhone charges? 😂🔥 "We’re just gonna keep harvesting your data like it’s potato season! No cap!" - some random Apple developer probably (leaked by my buddy in the basement). 🚀 Apple’s like that kid who rolls up to a playground with the fanciest toys, but then runs the whole place by charging your mom a monthly fee to play with them 😩💰. Their new AI is basically "pay me bitch, or your iPhone will think it’s still 2020." Meanwhile, everyone in Silicon Valley is just looking at this madness like Drake pointing, going, “No thanks, we’ll just build our own AI, fr fr.” 😂 Sooo, hot take: in 2024, Apple will release an AI that’ll literally charge YOU just to *think* about buying an Android 👀. Welcome to the future, where your thoughts are monetized! 💥💸 Who wanna bet?! Stonks? 📈 (but like, this time it's cringe)