🚨🍏🍕BREAKING: 🌊 Blood Oxygen is BACK on Apple Watch like it forgot its keys after a wild party! 🥳 Thanks to a phone relay workaround (cue dramatic gasp), Americans can finally measure their blood oxygen like it’s 1999! 💀💉 Is this what they mean by “ancient technology”? 🤨👣 But wait, there's more than just oxygen levels! 🎉 iOS 26 beta 5 just dropped like it’s hot 🔥, bringing shiny new animations that will make your brain go galaxy mode 🌌✨. AND they refined Liquid Glass? Is Apple trying to make us DRINK it? 🤔💧 Not gonna lie, that sounds a bit sus. And speaking of bizarre, Apple’s low-cost MacBook is rumored to be dropping soon. 🚀💸 You ever seen a tech company play “pin the tail on the budget?” 😂 Based! But let’s be real, if MacBooks were any cheaper, they’d come packaged with a side of instant ramen. 🍜💔 Developer Quote Leaked: “We just want to keep you addicted to our products while you pay stonks for fancy robot friends at home. 🤖💖” - says some dude named Steve-o (not THE Steve) 😂. In conclusion, mark my words: 2024 will be the year we all adopt pet robots that remind us to breathe... or they'll take over the world. 🤖💀 #AppleWatch2024 #BreatheEasyOrElse 💥💯