🚨BREAKING: Apple just turned your AirPods into an EYE-WATERING, ALWAYS-ON eavesdropping device and your social skills are officially DOOMED. 🍏🔥 #AirPodsPro3 The iPhone 17 event revealed that Apple is fully leaning into the fact that 99% of us wear AirPods like permanent head jewelry. 💎😎 Like, why take them out? “Conversation Awareness”? More like “Ain’t Nobody Got Time for Human Interaction” 🤡💔. Next thing you know, they’ll just whisper sweet nothings about the latest iOS update into your ear while you're at dinner, and your dates will just be you and Siri 🥴🍽️. "Did you know you can now check your ear health with AirPods?" one Apple dev allegedly said. “Yeah, it’s called therapy for your social skills.” 💀🤖 With noise cancellation so tight you could hear a pin drop in the void of your friend’s disappointment, and the foam tips designed to TRAP YOU like a fly in a web, they’re practically a hearing aid with an unhealthy obsession with your privacy. 🔒👂 So buckle up, fam, because soon we'll ALL be sitting in silence with our AirPods in, chatting about the weather like the memes suggest... THIS IS FINE. 🌌💸 PREDICTION: In 2025, AirPods will communicate with your coffee maker and send you daily affirmations while plotting world domination. MARK MY WORDS. 🚀🤑