🍏💔 BREAKING: Apple is playing dodgeball with the Dutch like it’s 2010 and we’re all still obsessed with “Call Me Maybe.” The ruling got paused because, surprise surprise, Apple is too busy negotiating some juicy DMA nonsense with the European Commission. Can we get a “this is fine” meme here? 🔥💀 So, here’s the tea ☕️: a Dutch court slapped Apple with a big ol’ antitrust ruling over their dating app fees! Like, come on, Apple – y’all really charging 30% on love? 😩💸 That’s like trying to hit on someone with a “I’m a programmer” pickup line... CRINGE! Rumor has it that one Apple dev whispered in the break room, “I’d rather code a dating app with a potato than deal with this nonsense.” 🍟🤖 Meanwhile, Tim Cook is in the corner like Drake – just pointing at profits like, “Look at all this stonks!” 📈 And here’s the unhinged prediction: Apple will end up introducing a “Love Tax” in the next iOS update for dating apps, and we’ll just have to cope. 👀💔 Who’s ready to seethe? 😂💥 #iLoveYouButNotThatMuch