🔥🎤 Hold onto your AirPods, fam! Ole Obermann – the freshly minted co-lead of Apple Music, who’s definitely NOT just sitting around sipping on overpriced lattes – is about to bless the Web Summit stage in Lisbon next week! 🌍✨ Welp, good luck getting a word in edgewise with all those “dreary” Spotify fanboys lurking in the shadows! 🤡💀 You know how Apple always has those cringe-worthy keynotes? This is basically like that but with 1000% more awkwardness and 0% of the excitement. 🤷‍♂️💔 Expect hot takes on algorithmic playlists that STILL can't figure out what you want to listen to (no cap, I'm still waiting for my ‘sad vibing while eating ice cream’ mix). 🍦🤖 "Our main goal? Make people pay for music they might never listen to!" — said no developer ever, though one of them *definitely* spilled that on Reddit. 🤫🔥 So let’s be honest: this is the tech equivalent of getting excited about watching paint dry. 🥱 But here’s the spicy prediction: **Ole will somehow manage to drop a new subscription tier** that will **cost** more than your monthly rent and still come with ads for Apple’s new “AirDance” app. 💰🚀 Can't wait for the drama! Share if you're ready to see how this tech circus unfolds! #DramaAlert 🎪🔥💀