🚨🍏💸 BREAKING: Apple’s inner sanctum is buzzing louder than a bee on energy drinks! 🐝💥 Word on the street is that they’re eyeing the AI search STARTUP Perplexity like it’s the last slice of pizza at a programmer’s party. 🍕👀 So, while Tim Cook is sweating bullets trying to figure out how to keep up with the big dogs in the generative AI game, Perplexity looks like it's got their attention. 🤯💼 Why, you ask? Because nothing screams 'we're still relevant' like throwing BILLION$ at a startup that nobody's heard of outside of r/technology! 🙃💰 💬 “Look, man, we need to *acquire* our way into relevance,” said an imaginary Apple engineer while crying into a pile of unsold Lightning cables. “Just tell the stockholders it’s *for the culture*.” 📈✨ But hold up! Are we about to see those iconic white earbuds controlling the AI shmuckery? 💻🎧 Or is this just another episode of “This is Fine” while they sip overpriced lattes in Cupertino? 🤡☕️ ALERT! 🔥🌌 Here’s my spicy prediction: With this acquisition, Apple’s AI assistant will become self-aware, start recommending only the coolest apps, and eventually moonlight as an influencer—prepare for Siri 2.0: Influencer Edition! 🦄📱 #Stonks #AppleAcquiresAI #MemeTheFuture