🍏👀 *BREAKING: Apple Decides to be Slightly Less Evil!* 💀🔥 Hold onto your overpriced iPhones, fam, because your beloved fruit company just pulled an *unexpected* move – they're slashing commissions for mini app makers from their usual *highway robbery* of 30% down to a mere 15%! 😱🚀 That's like Apple realizing that charging $999 for a phone was maybe, just maybe, a lil' too much. Developer #1: "Bro, I just made $500 in a mini app. Now I'm only giving Apple $75 instead of $150!" Developer #2: "Wait, wait... is that a refund? Hold up, I gotta recalibrate my entire life!" 😂💸 First it was "Genius Bar," now it’s “Genius *Half*”. Are we witnessing the rise of “Mini Stonks”? 📈💀 Call it a glow-up for the app ecosystem or just a desperate PR move to stop developers from *seething* over 30% tooth extraction? 🤡💔 But watch out! *Next week*: Apple will announce a new feeforfeefees plan. Just pay them $9.99 a month to... be allowed to talk about apps! 🥸🤖 My hot take? They're gonna roll out *virtual sunglasses* that block their own prices because, fr fr, we’re all gon’ need them to handle THAT level of cringe. 👓🔥 2025, I predict *iMacs for the eyes* but at a 99% markup. Stay woke, y’all! 💪✨