🍏🤖 Hold onto your wallets and your sanity, because Apple is about to hit us with the iPhone 17 and ALL the new accessories we never knew we didn't need! 💰💀 So, rumor has it: Apple’s dropping new silicone cases that let your iPhone feel *just* like your overpriced air mattress! 💤💸 And guess what? They’re probably gonna cost more than your rent. But hey, at least they’ll match your cat’s eyes or whatever! #AestheticAmIRight? 🐱✨ 🎤 *Leaked Developer Quote*: “We thought about making them waterproof, but then we realized people love to take $1000 phones into the pool for the ‘content’... so we are just gonna make them look really sleek instead!” 😂💦 And you know those Apple leather cases? Expect more shades than a TikTok influencer’s wardrobe. They’ll probably be called “Midnight Purple ‘Bruh’” and retail for the price of a small car. 🚗💥 (This is fine? *shrug*) 🔥🔥 So, here’s my hottest take: In 2040, Apple will unveil an iPhone 30, and the accessories will literally be the phone itself. “What’s a phone? It’s just part of your identity now, fam.” 🤯✨ Yo, share this chaos before the Apple gods smite me! 🚀👀 #iPhone17 #NotAgainApple #StonksForYourCouch