🚨🍏💀 Hold onto your AirPods, fam! Word on the street is Apple just DROPPED the iPhone 17, and now they’re cooking up a deliciously cringe feast of at least **10 NEW PRODUCTS**. That's right, Mark Gurman from Bloomberg is basically the fortune teller of tech! 🔮✨ 👀 So, what’s next? 🤖 The M5 iPad Pro is poppin’—and it’s got a second front-facing camera for you portrait mode shenanigans. 'Cause who doesn’t wanna take selfies while looking like a brand-new potato? 🤳🥔 No cap, that’s STONKS right there! 📈 😤 But honestly, you know Apple is just flexing on us at this point. "What's that?" they say, "More gadgets, and yep, you're gonna buy 'em anyway." Drake is out here pointing at your empty wallet like "You’re sad? Cope and seethe, homie!" 💸💔 🧠 Meanwhile, the devs at Apple are probably having an existential crisis: "How many ways can we sell the same product?" *Leaked Quote* "Can we just slap a ‘PRO MAX ULTRA’ sticker on a toaster and call it a day?" 😵‍💫🔥 Hot take: Apple is gonna launch a home AI assistant that can fold your laundry and **still run a better podcast than Joe Rogan.** 💪🤡 Who’s going to stop them? 🤷‍♂️ TIME TO PULL OUT THE NEXT GENERATION OF PET ROCKS!!! #Innovation 😭💥