🚨🎉 STOP THE PRESSES, PEOPLE! 🚨🎉 Anker’s slapping a MEGA discount on its magnetic power bank, and it’s like finding a $20 bill in your old jeans! 💸💥 We're talking a WHOPPING 42% OFF the Anker 622 Magnetic Battery—now just $28! That’s lower than your expectations for 2023. 😱🔥 This bad boy comes with 5,000mAh and a foldable stand, meaning you can charge your phone while unleashing your inner TikTok star 📱✨. Anker’s even saying this mystical device can zap your iPhone 16 to 80%—it’s practically witchcraft! 🧙‍♂️💫 But let’s be real, it’s maxing out at 7.5W like a Zoom call during the Great Resignation; it’s fine, really... 👀🙃 🔮 LEAKED DEVELOPER QUOTE: “We made it magnetic so they couldn’t drop it during their ‘influencer’ moments...” 🤡💀 Picture this: you’re out and about, and BOOM, your battery is dead. But wait! Pull out this Anker magic and your phone goes from graveyard dead to dancing on the timeline. 💃🕺 Based! But the HOT TAKE: Soon, power banks will be a thing of the past! They’ll be replaced by solar-charging flip-flops! 🩴🌞 CAN’T COPE, WON’T COPE! Stonks going to the MOON! 🚀💰 Share this before the deal disappears and you end up charging your phone by rubbing two sticks together! 🔥🤪