🎃🧙‍♂️🚨 ALERT! Amazon's Halloween Shop is LIVE, and it's spookier than your last Zoom call with your boss! 💀💼💀 Listen up, my fellow scaredy-cats! Forget the pumpkin spice lattes—it's time to fill your cart with enough ghoulish goodies to make your neighbor’s decorations look like child's play. 🏚️🔥 Picture this: you’re browsing Amazon in your dark cave (aka your mom's basement) 🏰 when you score some killer deals on costumes that will either have you looking like a snack or a total trainwreck—no cap! 🍬💸💀 Meanwhile, CEO Jeff Bezos is sipping on ghost juice while y’all fight over inflatable skeletons like it's Black Friday in a horror movie. 🥴🛒 “Yo, we really out here selling fake spiders?” says a leaked Amazon dev. “Let’s just throw in a couple of jump scares for good measure.” 😂🤖 So, channel your inner Drake and point at the costumes you want, then pretend to be edgy about it 🙄. But for real, this Halloween is gonna be lit 🔥—just don’t be that one dude wearing a cardboard box as a costume. That's just a cope! Hot take: The real spooky thrill this Halloween? That moment you realize your neighbors STILL have their Christmas lights on! 👻💡🧙‍♀️💰 #Stonks #ThisIsFine #TrickOrStonk 🌕👻